One night I was lying in my bed balling my eyes out and I cried out loud, "Help me, please somebody help me." I didn't believe in God so I have no idea who I thought would hear me.
But He did.
Three months later I was invited to a church gathering and I said, "No, church freaks me out." Again I was invited and I thought, “Well, I can check it out. It won't hurt.”
That night I heard a clear and concise message about Jesus. I heard a message that said He wanted to love me despite what I had been through or how broken I felt. That He wanted to know me and walk me through all I had experienced. All that had left me confused, pissed off, and really sad.
I sat in that church gathering with tears streaming down my face. Was this Jesus for real?
It has been 4 years since I’ve accepted Christ into my heart.
Jesus has completely flipped my life upside down. From the wisdom He gives me when I simply ask, the blessings He pours out because He’s that good, His powerful life changing Word, to the purpose He’s given me, I am reminded again and again I am not alone.
God is faithful and He wants to continue to do this in others lives.
I pray I am used as a tool for this purpose, for His purpose.
"I waited patiently for the Lord to help me,
and he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the pit of despair,
out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground
and steadied me as I walked along.
He has given me a new song to sing,
a hymn of praise to our God." Psalm 40
and he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the pit of despair,
out of the mud and the mire.
He set my feet on solid ground
and steadied me as I walked along.
He has given me a new song to sing,
a hymn of praise to our God." Psalm 40
4 comments:
I have been sitting here thinking about what I want to say and all I can say is how grateful I am that He found you. You called on Him without knowing you were and truly He answered.
Wow Kimi, your words are very powerful and an inspiration to everyone, specifically every young girl who has ever felt lost, alone, or unattached to the world. You've been an amazing person since the day I met you (in 1996:) but your journey has made you become who you are now. Love you.
Jenny I love you too-your comment means more to me than you know
Thank you so much for sharing your story. You have such strength and faith to share such pain in an open forum. I too have suffered rape and abuse, and I am afraid to speak out about it, but your courage inspires me.
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